Ocean Love

I jump and dive into the beautiful calming ocean water leading into infinity

At first, there is a sense of excitement, mysterious, calm and clarity with the gentle movement of the wave

But after swimming for a little longer, my heart starts beating faster and my muscle screams in pain

And I fight to catch a single breath, even though my lung is already full of water

In the end, I have to choose

To surrender and drown, or

To keep fighting until I get to the shore   

And that, my dear, is my feeling right now

And I don't want you to see or feel my internal sorrow

but even then,

I can't lie that 

I want to hold your hand

I want to spend time with you

But you are far away and nowhere to be found

Loving you was like sinking, like drowning

and back again to the surface

And I don't know what to do

I've been holding onto you

for far too long

I've been holding onto this dream 

that we once shared for far too long

Eventually, this needs and end

And I chose to slowly release me unto the hope of tomorrow

the obscurity between us

Perhaps it's the only way 

for us to be the better version

to love each other the way we need to be loved

Till next time,

Angie